What We Know

Well, one RE consultation, three blood work tests, one ultrasound, one SA, and one HSG later and this is what we know:  I have a slightly elevated FSH level (Follicle Stimulating Hormone) and both of my fallopian tubes are blocked.  I had a ruptured appendix in 1994, which caused infection to spread.  We did not know that I would have problems with getting pregnant down the road.  I have a hydrosalpinx at the end of my left fallopian tube (where the ovary is located).  When the egg is released, the tube cannot collect the egg.  The right fallopian tube is completely enveloped in scar tissue.  

What do we do next?  We're not really sure. Unfortunately, we have to wait until September 16th to meet with the RE again.  I still have blood work results that have not come back yet.  For now, we are trying not to get too down, but in all probability we will not have children on our own.

So, that's what we know for now.  We also know that we serve a big God and He can choose to do whatever He would like to do.  We still hold on to the hope that He is in control no matter what.  We will continue to serve Him regardless of our circumstances.

Thank you all for your continued prayers.

First RE Appointment

Our first appointment with the RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist) is set for August 19th.  We are anxious and excited at the same time to hopefully find out what is going on.  Prayers would be greatly appreciated!

I'm Letting Go

A few days ago, I was getting ready for work when suddenly a song came to my mind.  I had not listened to this song recently, so I thought it was kind of weird that I had this song in my head.  I felt like the Lord was trying to tell me something through this song.  I knew the main chorus, but it's not really a song that I normally listen to.  On my way to work I listened to the song called, "I'm Letting Go" by Francesca Battistelli.  Here are the lyrics:

Album: My Paper Heart

Artist: Francesca Battistelli

My heart beats, standing on the edge

But my feet have finally left the ledge

Like an acrobat

There’s no turning back

(Chorus)

I’m letting go

Of the life I planned for me

And my dreams

I’m losing control

Of my destiny

It feels like I’m falling and that’s what it’s like to believe

So I’m letting go

This is a giant leap of faith

Trusting and trying to embrace

The fear of the unknown

Beyond my comfort zone

(Chorus)

Giving in to your gravity

Knowing You are holding me

I’m not afraid

(Chorus)

Feels like I’m falling and that’s what it’s like to believe

Feels like I’m falling and this is the life for me

The night before this song came to my mind I walked into one of our bedrooms in our house that is totally empty.  We have a guest bedroom with furniture, but the bedroom beside the guest bedroom is empty.  I walked in there to clean, but when I was finished I just stood at the door staring at the room. I stopped and prayed for our future children that would be in that room.  I stopped and just listened to the Lord tell me to "let go."  I felt a peace come over me about everything. I feel like I'm starting to live my life in a different light.  I feel like I'm starting to let go of what I don't have control over anyway.  I feel like I'm really starting to trust Him completely. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wANs4_-i2vk